This is why unspoken expectations are danger zones

Honestly, I don’t know where to start from but I will try to start from somewhere. Did you read the previous article I wrote? The Peril of a preconceived mindset is meant to be this article. Unspoken expectations as danger zones is my experience and what the Holy Spirit let me notice; you probably may have been at this point before.

You never really know when expectations creep in, all you see is that you start wanting more from a person or program. It’s alright when these expectations come up and you are able to speak about them openly. The real problem is the unspoken expectations; For me, I thought my actions showed what I expected but it didn’t. My words didn’t convey these expectations, neither could the persons involved read my mind.

A few months ago, precisely in February, the Holy Spirit showed me things in regards to my unspoken expectations and I felt really bad. While I felt bad, I knew I had to apologize because of the damage it probably would have caused.

Do you ever feel like you have unspoken expectations? A common unspoken expectation I have had is expecting people to call me in the same intensity as I do them. Now, I register it in my mind to avoid expecting even the simplest things, just to avoid any stories that touch.

Have you ever heard this saying “Unspoken expectations are premeditated resentments“? I found it while making some research for this article.

Seeing the relationship you put a lot of effort into start sinking due to unspoken expectations can break your heart.

Better left unspoken?

God knows if I did think but it turns out I didn’t think. The expectations in my mind took its toll on the quality of some of my relationships. Since I’m the active doer in this story, I’ll leave my name as it is but change the names of the other participants.

Usually, I’m the friend or family member that does all the calling and looking for. It often is not a problem because I enjoy it until it dawns on me that my efforts are not being reciprocated. It is highly important that you understand that I know everyone has things to do, so I will not expect to be called ever so often.

A few times, I did try to bring up the subject but my approach didn’t work. Do you ever get to that stage where you feel you have done your best? I felt that way. I won’t even try to mince words here: I tried reducing the amount of times I called anyone. It became a point of duty to not call ever so often except it is necessary.

Do you ever feel like if you put in some distance, your presence will be missed? It works every time but where exactly is the limit?

My unspoken expectations became danger zones because I couldn’t have a conversation without expecting my mind to be read. In turn, my attitude towards the concerned people began deteriorating.

When the Holy Spirit began showing me where I was wrong, I realised I never took notice of my attitude change. If I wasn’t shown, I would never have believed my attitude could ever change towards the concerned people.

Unspoken expectations are danger zones

Now, I know unspoken expectations are danger zones because they wreak havoc if let to linger. Experience is the best teacher but in this case, let my experience teach you.

When I did notice all of this, the first thing I did was apologise. It isn’t easy to apologise to someone for something they have no idea about. I could avoid the apology but I decided not to. It’s better to let it out and have someone hold you accountable for your actions.

Every time I look back to this scenario, I am thankful for the opportunity to be able to change the story before it got too bad. It doesn’t matter how bad you think it is, there’s still a chance to make corrections. Let those expectations out, discuss them and set yourself free!