At the end of a conversation, sometimes, I feel like I should have documented it. Now, they’ll just be unheard conversations. More often than not, these conversations bring on a new perspective. Have you had any conversation like this before? Recently I had an unheard conversation with God. Let’s rewind a bit, okay?
In the month of February, I was MIA (Missing in Action) on the blog. Do you ever just feel like you need to give yourself some space and time? From your normal routine? That’s how I felt.
How did I get here? I don’t know but the willingness to do anything was not present. If I could describe it, I’d say I was super tired. The months before, I had attended a wedding, written my thesis -final project- and done some more things.
Retreat Tales
Just before February started, I decided to go on a retreat. Have you ever gone on a retreat? Of your own will? The first time I participated in a retreat was in high school but then it was imposed. However, this time, I chose to go for one of my own free will.
Prior to my retreat, I’d informed the necessary parties of my absence. Do you get this feeling that you’re not doing the right thing? That’s how the first day was. No defined structure was in place but I knew what I wanted to leave with. I went about listening to sermons and just trying to settle in.
In truth, the first day helped me see how much better I needed to be. A review of 2020 helped me see that. By the second day, the structure was understandable; Bible in one hand, journal on the other.
The unheard conversations left me wanting more, I didn’t want to leave. Above all, there was a sense of certainty I had. As a result, I was ready to face the world again.
Retreats are needed because as it goes, it’s a time for you to withdraw and reflect. You should give it a try!
You’re not in control
The real reason I actually started writing this article is to share this section. I wanted it to be something that you can relate with, whilst learning as well.
This time, my unheard conversation with God began with someone annoying me even after I’d told them off. I couldn’t understand why I’d say “Don’t do it” and the person would disregard it.
Mid-way, I got quite frustrated and angry. I knew if I responded immediately, I’d say things I didn’t mean. So I took a break and just took it to God. Do you ever do this? or Have you ever done it?
Honestly, I didn’t say anything but my heart gave it all away. If I had to speak, would I have said the right things? I don’t know but I remember being quiet. Right now, I don’t recall when but I heard the Holy Spirit tell me “You’re not in control”.
Do you ever get to a point that if things don’t go the way you want, you get frustrated? I wanted to be in control of the situation but God reminded me that He’s in control.
Whatever it may be, this is a kind reminder that God is in control. Even when the situation looks bleak, God is definitely in control.
Read previous article: The Resonating Silence: Persecution of the faith
